Episode 5 Recap: The Princess Bride
On this week’s episode of Bachelorette Party: Las Vegas we learn that brides--they’re just like us! They have to save money too. Sure, it would be AWESOME if you could wave a wand and poof! A Vera Wang gown and a honeymoon to Italy magically appear! But even fairy godmothers are on a budget in this economy. Bippity Boppity Booooooooo, indeed!
This week we meet the beautiful blonde bachelorette, Erin, from Southern California. She and her fiancé Sabour are paying for their dream wedding themselves and are on a strict budget. I love how responsible they are. I bet they have good health insurance and put money in their 401ks! Anyway—despite their limited finances, Erin wants a fairytale wedding. She’s been dreaming about her big day since she was four. “Brides are the prettiest women out there,” she declares. Well, she obviously does not remember Dennis Rodman in a wedding gown. Oh, wait, he’s not a woman. Oops!
We meet all of Erin’s friends, including Jessamy, a Southern Belle from Kansas (I was confused too). Jessamy is organizing the bachelorette party because maid-of-honor Courtney has to work that weekend and thus can’t make it to Vegas. Hmmmmm, my detective skills are usually on point and I have a suspicion that Courtney MIGHT just show up.
And she does! Courtney is a WEDDING PLANNER (love it!) and she is going to be able to escape to Vegas for one day. Yahooooo!
We go to Vegas where our VIP Palms Dream Team is drafting plans for the weekend. Jon Gray, looking suave in his suit, wants to throw a wedding-themed weekend complete with a cocktail hour, flower centerpieces, and a huge cake. JROC agrees, because he wants to see cake fights! Our trusty Brit Elliot needs to find this cake and put jewelry in it. Silent Erin actually speaks this week! She suggests that they get designer Simone Carvalli to donate a dress since Bachelorette Erin hasn’t bought one yet.
The guys start getting ready. They bring the cake to the suite. Jon Gray does not approve because the cake is tall and tiered, not wide and big! Harsh, Jon! Fine, then, give it to me and I’ll eat it. I show no prejudice towards my cake. Liz Out Loud is an equal opportunity cake eater.
The girls finally arrive. There is a string quartet, champagne, pictures of Erin and Sabour. No cake though—yet. They get ready to go out when there is a knock at the door. They think it is dinner . . . but it is actually a shoe! And not just any shoe—a sparkly red-soled Louboutin! And Erin and her crew need to go on a scavenger hunt to find the other one. Gosh, I hope Cinderella is not jealous. She only got a glass slipper! Erin declares that this day is the best day of her life, besides her proposal. I guess she just loves getting shiny sparkly things!
JROC and Elliot stop by the suite to take the girls out. Erin flips out when she spots a stiletto in the casino but, wah, wah, wah (that’s supposed to indicate whiny trombone sounds a la Debbie Downer) it is a fake to throw her off!
Erin and company go outside to board a horse-drawn carriage that is going to take them down the Strip. With a police escort. In traffic. Erin feels like Cinderella! And just like Cinderella, she’s no diva. “I have the world’s best friends ever!” Man, I love Erin! She’s fun and blonde and fiscally responsible and nice. I hope she reads this and decides to invite me to her wedding. Maybe Sabour will have some cute friends!
The next morning maid of honor Courtney leaves super early because she has to work at a wedding. What a cruel, ironic world we live in! The camera pans the suite. It is . . . clean. A little clutter here and there but the girls have shown remarkable respect for other people’s property. How mature!
They go out to eat where Erin receives another impostor heel. While they’re eating, The VIP team goes to the suite with a huge *ss cake that’s as big as a football field. The ladies return and Jon Gray explains how there are 6 pieces of jewelry buried in the cake worth anything from $5 to $1500 and now they have to dive into the cake and find them. Hmmm, you know what you’d need to put in my wedding cake to make me happy? Cake! I’m easy like that.
The girls clean up so they can go to the Simone Carvalli fashion show. Erin fears seeing a dress she really likes since she knows she can’t afford it. I giggle because I am in on the surprise! And so are you! After the show, designer Ruben Cruz brings them backstage so Erin can try on dresses. She loves one with a full skirt and a sweetheart neckline. She twirls around like a princess and then, gasp, she finds the other Louboutin. Ruben then lets her in on the big secret: the dress is hers. For free! Yeah!
The ladies head back to the suite. Bridesmaid Maureen, who was Sabour’s friend before she knew Erin, calls Sabour. She says how excited she is that Erin got a dress. But this was supposed to be a surprise for Sabour! Uh oh spaghetti-o! Maureen confesses to Erin what she did, and Erin is pissed for one hot minute, high school-style. But then they hug and make up because, you know, they’re adults! And that’s what adults do!
It’s their last night in Vegas, and Erin and her crew go out. Stacy, another one of Sabour’s friends, gets wasted. Erin takes her back to the room where she proceeds to throw cake. While I do admit I like these girls quite a bit, their abuse of cake horrifies me.
The next morning the girls wake up, looking a bit hungover. They complain they don’t want to go to work. See! They really are just like us! They drink their water out of wineglasses. Good times!
All in all, it was a successful weekend. Erin got her fairytale bachelorette weekend. Hopefully her wedding itself will be more, er, Kate Middleton than Cinderella because Cinderella had to deal with so much crap! Evil stepsisters, evil stepmothers, coaches turning into pumpkins, etc. And you know Erin would die if she ever lost her shoe.
Till next week when we meet another bachelorette!
Liz Out Loud
P.S. This show has gotten me looking up wedding dresses. I shake my fist at you!