Q&A with Date Coach George Ray
Find Me My Man is premiering tonight, so we spoke to co-star and date coach George Ray about first date no-nos, his perfect woman, and how had real chemistry with one of the Find Me My Man contestants! Read on, and scroll down for a sneak peek of Find Me My Man, airing tonight at 9/8c.
What are the worst dates you've been on as a coach? Do you have any dating horror stories?
The worst date I went on was Episode 2 with La-Teez-ya. You will have to tune to find out why….
What are the most common annoying traits you encounter while on dates?
The most common and annoying traits that I have encountered while on dates is a woman who never ask me any questions but rather talks about herself the entire time. Another one is a woman who talks about marriage or having kids while on the first date. It’s a total turn off for me and most guys who are just looking to get to know you on the first date…not hear a chronoogy of your entire life and how many kids you want and your wedding plans. Every guy knows a woman has those plans in her head… but they should not be revealed on the first date unless you want it to be your last date.
What are three tips all women should know when going on a first date?
- Never tell a man what type of guy fits your bill. For example, don’t give him the rundown on your check list. If you do, you may never get to truly know the guy you were attracted to...because you have just given him a script to follow. Don’t be all mad and upset if he wins the Academy Award for misleading you or misrepresenting himself, because you directed his role by giving him the perfect script! Instead you should just evaluate him for the qualities you’re looking for in a man.
- Don’t talk about sex on the first date unless you are just looking for a booty call because the guy you meet might think he has an easy lane to your thing.
- A lot of women fill the need to put out disclaimers. It’s not appropriate for the first date. For example "if you’re not looking for kids and marriage, please don’t waste my time." or "I don’t believe in having sex until after 90 days" or "if you’re not serious about having a committed relationship we should not go past the first base".. You will never make it to the ball game if you tell a man any of these things on the first date, so you won’t have to worry about him going up for bat! Most women do this inadvertently because of baggage that steams from failed relationships and attemp s to establish something meaningful. It’s called shooting yourself in the foot and if you like nice pumps, it’s not a good idea.
Does it help on a first date if two people have overlapping interests or hobbies?
Yes but too much could be boring in the sense that there is nothing new to learn or talk about. I like to learn new things about people’s occupations and personal interests. You could just find yourself agreeing with everything that the other person is talking about, which for me is kinda boring. Einstein said it best: "opposites attract and likes repel."
How important is raw physical attraction on a first date?
Not important at all…you don’t know what is underneath those clothes until after you really get to know a person. You might be surprised at what you discover…good or bad...but I know you’re probably thinking if you’re reading this, Isn’t physical chemistry important? YES…YES…and YES, however don’t underestimate a person if you’re not impressed at first glace. Even an ugly duckling can turn into a swan. Sometimes people dress more conservative on the first date and I strongly recommend that…ladies, leave something to the imagination! Don’t use sex as a weapon on the first date because you might be looked at as a object rather than a person. Don’t have your ass-sets hanging out on the first date.
Describe the ideal first date?
I don’t have an ideal first date since I have been on so many. But I would say meeting someone who has good conversation and who is relaxed, not someone who is asking questions like I am being interrogated or asking leading questions that imply the next step is marriage. The first date should be purely a surface level meeting to get to know a person better not reveal your baggage or insecurities.
Are you in a relationship?
No I am not in a relationship but I am looking, when the time is right she will come along… but she has gotta be ready to handle a tall order. She has tobe well accomplished and confident in whom she is or else...
IF NO, have you ever wanted to go on a "real" date with anyone you've ever
coached? (Because we'd think this is human nature to feel this way.)
Yes…of course! However, I have to remain professional at all times because it could compromise the integrity of our matchmaking process. If I decided to do so, she will have to be The One or very close to it. If this was a F.B.I investigation, my job would be entrapment because I have seriously thought about it a few times and been really close. You can’t put a single guy around a bunch of single women and not expect some type of chemistry to develop. It is the most difficult part of my job but also the most exciting. Episode 3 is a prime example, but you will just have to stay tuned to find out why…….
What's the secret to love? Is there one?
PATIENCE….PATIENCE…and more PATIENCE…we are all human so no one is going to be perfect you must be patient enough to identify those qualities in someone. Tto establish a bond and have patience enough to tolerate them when they do things to upset you. Remember we all have to give up something in order to get what we want, you must be ready for the challenge. Most people think love's is just a feeling of happiness, but there will always be obstacles and bumps in the road and if you have patience you can always rekindle passion, as that will fluctuate from time to time. If you’re someone with a short attention span…good luck mylove!
Stream the Sneak Peek of Find Me My Man
Tune in to 'Find Me My Man' premiering Apr. 9 at 9/8c