Amber on Love Games Episode 6: Lewd, Prude & Otherwise
I don't want to be that stupid girl making out with a guy who is talking about me behind my back and falling for another girl.I thought that the sexy photo shoot challenge was fun but stressful. We had to get the perfect picture. But what if someone blinks or the background scene that we choose doesn't look natural? I wanted to win the challenge so bad so that Natalie wouldn't have a chance to throw any of my guys up for elimination. When the judge announced that Natalie won, I almost fell to the ground! Her picture was not in the least bit classy. It was disgusting and there was so much going on, that it was hard to decipher what the pictures was trying to depict.
PHOTOS: See how the other girls looked in the photo shoot challenge!
I was hesitant to kiss Corey B during hot tub truth or dare because I had made it a point to all of the guys that I was not going to kiss anyone in this game. Maybe I am a rarity but, when I am in the dating world, and I see a guy that I really like kiss or do anything else with another girl, I automatically check them off my list as I am no longer interested. It’s a territorial thing for sure, but I didn't want any of these guys checking me off of their lists if they feel the same way, and a few of the guys had expressed to me, that they are the same way, and that they like my respect for them and the morals that I possess.
I don't blame the guys for accusing me that I have a boyfriend because I wouldn't make out with anyone. Like I said, I know it’s a rarity that a girl wouldn't just make out with a guy as hot as Corey B. However, I want to keep myself in the game, and I want most of the guys to like me and I wanted most of the guys to want to be that first kiss. So it was my strategy and my God given personality to wait before I began that emotional bond. Not to mention when I kiss someone I need to know if they are 100% into me like I am into them. I don't want to be that stupid girl making out with a guy who is talking about me behind my back and falling for another girl...and the answer is no on my having a boyfriend. I would never come on with a boyfriend, and shame on anyone who would. When I left Phoenix, I had gone on a few dates with a couple of guys, and that's about it. No commitment with anyone.
I was feeling forced to eliminate Bruno because Benz and Robert were two of the guys that Lea liked, and Lea was not about to let those two guys go. Bruno was the only guy out of the three boys that I made a real connection with and I wasn't ready to send him home. When Tanisha demanded that I stand up for myself I was a little nervous to do so, because the one time that I happened to stand up for myself, I got hit by Seabiscuit's horseshoe. When I finally did stand up for myself, I was extremely happy that I did. It felt exhilarating. I do it all of the time now!
When Bruno was eliminated anyways I was so hurt, mostly because I felt betrayed by Lea. Anytime that I had made HBIC I always put Natalie's guys up for elimination. Never did I hesitate when Lea gave her input on who she wanted to send packing, and the one time that I wanted to keep someone, Lea sent him home. After all was said and done, Lea had explained to me why she sent Bruno home. Even though I wanted Bruno in the house, I understand why she made that decision. No hard feelings :)