Pretty Wicked

What's your favorite part of your body?My soul. Nevermind! I lost it in a bet.
What's your least favorite part of your body?My mouth. It's always getting me into trouble.
Do you use your looks to get what you want?I try. However, I find psycho kinesis is more effective.
When was the last time your looks got you out of trouble?I don't get into trouble! You'll never catch me – stutter, everybody knows I'm like butter! Yeah, I'm an aspiring white rapper.
Have you ever cheated on a partner?It's not cheating if you're not exclusive... and I'm not an advocate of exclusivity.

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What songs do you listen to make you feel sexy?I'm really not into music. I can't dance... I mean, I really can't dance. I can't even clap along to "Hail to the Victors." Accordingly, music just makes me feel uncoordinated...unless I'm lit up on wine or vodka.
What's the most outrageous thing you've done for attention?I had my breasts augmented. Also, I humiliated my ex in FHM. I wanted to be heard. I went on a reality show...and I would do it all again!
Personal words to live by?Marilyn Monroe: "It's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring." And I made this one up myself: "Being underestimated is one's greatest advantage in life."
What's your theme song?"Just Dance" by Lady Gaga. Specifically the following lines: Can't find my drink or man. Where are my keys, I lost my phone. What's go-ing out on the floor? I love this record baby, but I can't see straight anymore. Keep it cool what's the name of this club? I can't remember but it's alright, alright. And "Material Girl" by Madonna. I actually have a home karaoke video of me at 8 years old to this song. My little brothers were my backup singers and I sported a huge blonde wig.
After you're long gone, what do you want people to remember about you?I will never be "long gone." I plan to achieve immortality through my writing. However, if that doesn't pan out and metaphorical immortality is not an option, I'll pursue literal immortality by being cryogenically frozen whenever contemporary cosmetic surgery is no longer able to sustain my fabulousness.

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What are you looking for in a partner?I don't believe in "types"...However, I do need someone with intelligence, ambition, humor, etc. etc.
Best pick up line you've ever heard? (Or used?)Me: "Wanna makeout?" No one says "no" to this face. As far as men using pickup lines, they are completely unnecessary and never work! However, gifts are always welcome! After talking to me and my mother for a few moments poolside in Vegas, a man sent up a champagne brunch to my room addressed to me AND my mother. Super smooth.
Worst pick up line you've ever heard?"That shirt's very becoming on you. Of course, if I were on you I'd be coming too." Simply offer me a drink or a business card, NOT a sperm bath! Also, I'm really sick of men from the "Pickup Artist" generation. Genuine compliments only work on me, not "negs." I've read "the bible" of picking up women too! I will just call the guy out and be like: "If you need instructions on how to socialize with women, move on, because you're not going to be able to handle me. I'll devour you."
Describe your perfect dateAren't dates the things you eat when you're constipated? Or are those prunes?
Describe the worst date imaginable:One where I'm paying!

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What are your must have beauty accessories?Extensions, an eyelash curler, and primer. I need a power washer to get my makeup off when I use primer before applying foundation. Also, my dog Butters decked out in Burberry.
You refuse to leave the house without:Mascara.
Worst fashion trend you've seen?Ugg boots and skinny jeans on fat girls. They aren't called "fat jeans" for a reason.
What do you wear to draw attention to yourself?I like to wear the opposite of what everyone expects. If I'm going to a club where all of the broads sport painted on dresses, I'll rock some tight jeans and a simple, small, white T-shirt with an eclectic necklace. If everyone is dressing conservatively in business attire, I will don a black cocktail dress with fishnets and cherry red shoes.

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Who's your celebrity crush?Sacha Baron Cohen and Britney Spears... I still heart her.
In the movie of your life, who would you want to play you?My goal in life is to become a blonde Jewish author/late-night talk show host, so Chelsea Handler because she's blonde, Jewish, writes hilarious books and has her own late-night comedy talk show.

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Lips?Sacha Baron Cohen.
Hair?Sacha Baron Cohen.
ButtSacha Baron Cohen.
Bank accountStupid question. Obviously any A-lister... but I will take Sacha Baron Cohen and his bank account over Tom Cruise's any day!

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Nose?Jessica Simpson.
Lips?Adriana Lima.
Breasts?Me!
Butt?Kim Kardashian.
Legs?Beyonce.
Hair?Eva Mendez.
Bank account?Stupid question.

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Lights on or off?Depends how drunk I am... but I do own a generator.
Pink or Black?Black. I'm not a pubescent child. I'm a woman who will take a riding crop over a lollipop any day.
Sweet or Spicy?Saucy. A hybrid of the two!
Lace or Leather?Fur. I'm a lady, not a stripper or a biker.
Hugs or Kisses?Kisses! I don't like people invading my personal space unless we're making out.

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Give or Receive? I receive and I give to receive.
Love or Lust?I lust many and love few.
Confess your worst deed:I peed in my roommate's Crystal Light because I thought she locked me out of the house. Other than that... I've grown a little over the years, so I can't go into detail, but I announced some really humiliating stuff in a national men's magazine (FHM) about an ex to get back at him for telling me: "You're not universally pretty. Most people wouldn't find you pretty like I do." He also asked me: "How did it feel to know that every girl in the room wanted your boyfriend tonight?" after I threw him a CD release party. I didn't get a, "Thank you!" Just that. He cried when the magazine ran my confession. He was projecting his insecurity onto me so I gave him something to be insecure about.
Do you think other people are jealous of your looks?Catty insecure girls are jealous of my looks. Confident women know how to appreciate other women of aesthetic value.
Do you have women as friends?I have a blowup doll named Molly. If she upsets me, I just deflate her and store her under the bed. No, really, I'm fortunate enough to have some very confident, intelligent, fun girlfriends.

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Cheating?If no one ever makes it past the first date, there's no need.
Do you think you are a "bitch"?Not after living with some of the sociopaths from Pretty Wicked. I think I'm fabulous.
Rate yourself on a scale of 1-10. I'm an 11 on a scale from 1-10. Men bore quickly if you only offer superficial beauty; I'm the entire package.