Pop Culture Style

10 Thoughts Every Busty Girl Has While Bra Shopping

Newsflash: there are other colors in the world besides white, black, and beige.

Are you physically exhausted? Emotionally drained? Feeling like you hate your body? Then you're probably a busty girl who's just gone bra shopping. Others may think that having big boobs is all compliments and sex appeal, but busty girls know the struggle is real - especially when it comes time to revamp your underwear drawer. Here are 10 thoughts every busty girl has while going through the horror that is bra shopping.

1. .  Why am I here right now?


As soon as you go to try on the first bra you've picked out, every negative experience you've ever had while bra shopping comes flooding back to you all at once, leaving only one question: Why are you doing this? You could be doing any number of things right now that don't make you want to punch yourself in the face. Sure, you need new bras, but you at least have the one you're wearing right now. Surely that means you can put this off for another month or so, right? Right?

2. .  For the love of all things good, someone please tell these people that boobs do come in bigger sizes than like, D.

Spending endless hours sorting through the cute tiny bras to get to the bigger ones they hide on the back of the racks can leave anyone struggling to keep their blood pressure down. These companies do know that boobs come in all kinds of sizes, right? That boobs don't just stop growing when they get to D? And that being busty is far from uncommon? So why the hell don't most stores stock anything bigger than a C or D? And what's with the lack of variety as far as band sizes? You can have a small band size and big cup size and vice versa. I feel like this shouldn't be an issue, and yet here we are.

3. .  You want how much for this bra?

You have not experienced true sticker shock until you try on the perfect bra only to look down and realize in shock that it costs most than most of the pieces in your wardrobe. How come my smaller-chested friends get to buy cute fun bras at Target for like 7 dollars and I have to fork over a hundred dollar bill for two bras - if I'm lucky? Brb, starting a petition on change.org to fight this.

4. .  Who even needs breasts? Like, for real.

Raise your hand if you've stared sadly at racks and racks of cute, reasonably-priced bras that you know will never fit because life is unfair.

5. .  Wow, I am so sick of taking off my shirt right now.

On, off, on, off. Hooking and rehooking and adjusting the girls over and over to try on bras gets old really, really fast.

6. .  The lady who did my fitting is out of her damn mind.

Being properly fitted for a bra is super important, especially as a busty girl, but what's equally important is making sure it's done by someone who knows what they're doing. Going to the fitting room with a handful of bras in a size you haven't worn since middle school because the sales person insisted they would fit (likely because it's the biggest size in stock and they want you to buy something) is the most awkward thing ever.

7. .  I was not emotionally prepared for this.

I don't know about you, but I need to mentally prepare myself for being hit with views of my boobs (not to mention the rest of my body) from about 5 thousand angles at once. I'm a reasonably confident girl, but nobody looks good hunched over shirtless, trying to wrestle themselves into an uncooperative, underwire-lined demon contraption.

8. .  So my choices are this ugly beige vomit-y color, a blinding white that will fade as soon as I wash it, and black? Black it is.

"Lol, what are patterns?" said every department store bra manufacturer, ever. No more. No more!

9. .  This is why I shop online.

Because now I've wasted my entire afternoon and I feel emotionally drained. I am never doing this ever again.

10. .  Ok, so maybe this wasn't a total waste of time.

Bra shopping may be a colossal pain in the you-know-what, but there's nothing that compares to that feeling you get when you've finally found the perfect bra. And just to make sure you don't take that feeling for granted, the universe only allows such a thing to happen like once a year.

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