7 Reasons To Go On A Second Date Even If You Didn't Click On The First
In today's feverish dating scene, going on a second date if your first one wasn't completely amazing might sound ludicrous. With the advent of social media, meeting new people has never been easier and it’s getting harder to give someone a second shot when there are more options around every turn (or, every swipe to the right). That said, hear us out. Barring he's not guilty of our dating deal breakers, there are many reasons why you should go on the second date even if you don't click on the first. Being quick to dismiss someone based on the connection not happening right away could mean losing out on a potentially incredible relationship that's just a little slower to start.
1. Maybe your date had a bad day
Your date might not be comfortable saying so but maybe they had an awful day that caused them to act differently. If the day of the date, your boss gave you a hard time or your mom called to read you the riot act over how many of her friends have grandkids while you’re STILL dating, wouldn’t you have trouble relaxing and acting like your normal self? If your date isn’t a completely awful human being and you have even the most remote connection, it might be worth giving it one more shot. They could’ve had the day from hell and were doing all they could to make the date go well despite being in a terrible mood.
2. Maybe YOU had a bad day
We all know how easy it is to let a bad mood out on someone we care about so of course, you could let it out on a relative stranger too – possibly, without even realizing it. You might have been low on patience or not in the mood to be a very good listener and in your cloud of misery, you missed out on signs that your date is actually pretty great. If you know deep down you weren’t your best self on the first date, maybe consider a second. That is, if you haven’t scared your date off.
3. Your date might be slow to open up
Some people can be shy and slow to let others get to know them. If this is your only complaint after a first date and they seem like a decent person otherwise, give them another shot. They might have been incredibly nervous and not acting like their usual self in the glow of your amazingness!
4. Sometimes, physical attraction takes a while
We’ve all heard of those fantastic couples that started off as just friends, which means that physical attraction may not have happened right away, even in the best of relationships. If you got a good vibe from your date and had a lot to talk about but didn’t feel that instant physical connection, it could definitely be worth a second date to see if something more might develop. There is such a thing as lust at first sight but that doesn't always mean a couple is meant to be. Conversely, a couple might not feel that attraction right away but still could be very happy together if they are patient and let the chemistry happen over time.
5. You’re still getting to know them
The questions you ask each other on a first date might be totally perfunctory depending on how well you knew each other beforehand. If you had no prior contact and don't really know them through mutual friends, you have a lot of basics to get through before getting to the fun stuff. Where do they work? Where did they grow up? What was their college major? These might not be the most interesting questions but they do need to be addressed. It could take the whole first date to get this conversation going and it could get a lot better if you go out one more time with the base of the first date to build on.
6. They might end up being a great friend
If you genuinely got along with someone on a first date but felt no physical attraction, it could be worth going on a second date because you may end up with a great friend after all is said and done. Even if that physical attraction never happens, you might miss out on having one more fun person to hang out with platonically if you give up after one date. And you never know – if you become friends, they could end up introducing you to someone they know who you do end up dating.
7. You've only seen them in one environment
If you went to a loud bar and your date is a bit of an introvert, they may not have been happy amid all the hustle and noise. If you tried bowling and your date was awful at it they may not have felt comfortable enough to be themselves or to even be totally pleasant to be around! If you suspect they were simply uncomfortable where you went on your first date, suggest something very different for the second. Who knows – they may only need a change of scenery.