Hey all! It’s been soooo long since we’ve spoken. I was on vacation last week where I drank a lot of Guinness but was in bed every night by midnight. Based on last week’s ep, Joey Lynn would have TOTALLY bitched about how boring I was. Good thing she wasn’t with me!
Anyway, this is not the Liz Out Loud show (at least not yet!) so let’s go on, shall we?
First, let’s celebrate with the good news: Christie’s ulcer is gone! Maybe she will stop nagging Matthew? Maybe she will move on from blaming Joey Lynn for causing all the ill will in the world? Eh, who I am fooling? Her ulcer’s absence will change nothing.
On Joey’s team, we have Amanda whose parents are in Italy. She has the house to herself so it’s time to party with all her girls! Kind of like you did in high school, but these girls are all in their 20s and grown so their rebellious streak makes me laugh. I want to tell them that they could just move out and pay their own rent and have parties all the time. Joey Lynn continues to whine about how she thought Amanda was more of a rock star. She can’t believe how boring she was in Miami! I’m thinking, Um she did manage to stand on her own two feet the whole time and never showed her cooch onscreen so give the girl some credit! Amanda stands up to Joey Lynn, pointing out that she has a job where she is on her feet from 9-5 and can’t get wasted every 3 minutes. But, she does take a shot to appease Joey Lynn.
We see a different, less badass side of Joey Lynn when she enlists Valona’s help in finding her “future ex-husband” at a Wall Street bar. Joey Lynn is super nervous (even though the whole thing was her idea.) She has a hard time selecting the perfect outfit since all she owns is tank tops. Valona encourages her to not say “youse” when she opens her mouth to talk to guys which is probably good advice. They take a taxi into Manhattan, acting like tourists the whole way, snapping pictures of sidewalks and buildings. I’m starting to think this is their first time outside of Brooklyn aside from Miami. Actually, they did fly out of JFK which is in Queens so good for them. You have to spread your horizons one baby step at a time. When they arrive at the bar, Joey Lynn is too nervous to talk to anyone so she takes shot after shot after shot. She calls her friend JJ to come over from Brooklyn. Valona is exasperated because all Joey Lynn ever does is complain about BK guys and then now that she is in a bar full of Manhattan guys, she calls a guy from home to meet up. Joey Lynn keeps on drinking while JJ and Valona talk. Joey Lynn gets annoyed because she thinks Valona is flirting with him. He ends up fleeing to a saner borough while Joey Lynn has to be literally carried from the bar by Valona. What an effective visit to a Wall Street bar to find a future ex-husband! Valona points out that while Joey Lynn may talk about how much she wants to leave Brooklyn, she doesn’t really seem to want to.
Meanwhile, Christie’s boyfriend Matthew, his twin brother John, and their best friend Ryan get ready to go out for a guy’s night. Based on the amount of time they spend primping, I would not be surprised if their evening consists of a visit to a high end spa. But no, they are going to a bar where Christie conveniently shows up. Everyone is pissed, especially Ryan who confronts her while Matthew says nothing. Methinks this relationship is not long for this world.
I was just thinking of how I was missing Angelina when low and behold she appears on my screen. We find out that her father is currently out on bail for racketeering. He could go to prison for anywhere from 1 to 25 years. And this is not the first time he’s been locked up. Ouch. Angelina is dating this new guy Anthony and she is upset that if the relationship goes anywhere her dad may not be there to walk her down the aisle. First, though, she invites Anthony over to cook dinner for him. She has some assistance from her mom, who is an adorable fellow chain-smoker. Anthony shows up with a bottle of wine and cookies, fulfilling every stereotype of the nice Italian-American boy. He toasts to health and happiness, which makes me laugh and laugh and laugh because Angelina and her mom keep sneaking out for smoke breaks. Regardless, I like them together and I hope this relationship lasts.
We return to Joey Lynn, taking shots of Jameson alone in her house and looking at old photos of her and her old friends. She seems to genuinely miss Carla and her old friends. Carla, meanwhile, is hanging out with Toni Lynn who is determined to reunite the two. She calls Joey Lynn and asks her to meet up with them. Carla is annoyed but she agrees to talk.
When they finally meet up the tension is very thick. They are standing out on the street outside of Carla’s brother Marco’s apartment. Carla gets in a verbal fight with some girls on the street. Glasses are thrown, barbs are exchanged. Even Joey Lynn seems genuinely surprised by the randomness of it all. Carla calms down, sort of, and returns her attention to Joey Lynn. And what do they talk about? Oh, the fateful night when Joey Lynn MAY have slept with Christie’s ex-boyfriend Roberto. Joey Lynn denies it, swearing on her dead father’s grave. She does admit that she walked in on Roberto and another girl, Cassie, but she didn’t do anything. Carla doesn’t understand why she never spoke up when it happened. Nothing is resolved and they go their separate ways.
The screen flashes to a girl we have never met before but we sure know about . . . the infamous Cassie! She reveals to us that she knows the truth of what happened that night because she was there. Oh snap! I can’t wait to finally settle this once and for all next week!
Liz Out Loud