Naturally, since the theme was adaptability, I expected the operative for the week to be unpredictability. I was curious to find out what sort of curve balls they would throw at me.
I was mortified when I heard we would be singing the song as a solo. Then, I got over it. I loooove a good challenge, and being tested on how well I can adapt to a challenge. Moreover, I'm thinking, “LOL ... I'm gonna sing a huge Alanis song on national television. Get it, Black rocker!”
I was horrified about learning choreography on set. I can dance, sure, but by the time we got to the video shoot, I was in my head about it. When I'm fearless I can dance well, but being judged on how well and how fast I got the choreography because it's adaptability week was stressful.
I wasn't pleased with my music video performance. As the theme was adaptability, I no longer saw Erik as a Director, he became a judge. I was so afraid of using too much of his time asking for clarity to his acting direction, that I just didn't ask at all. I think that normally on set I would have the time to ask for clarity and I wouldn't be afraid to, however, within this competition where I'm being judged for my ability to adapt to things quickly, the stress and apprehension was high. I didn't make good use of my glass of water and iPod.
I wasn't surprised to hear the judges’ feedback because I expected the response they gave. I was given an iPod and a glass of water, and I made the acting decision to be rich kid that was listening to music and doing his own thing. When my fear of not adapting fast enough to Erik's direction came into play, I ended up trapped in my own head and didn't deliver a camera popping performance this week. I figured I would be in the bottom three, so no surprise when I realized I was in the bottom half of the bottom six.
I am an enormous fan of Charlie's voice, and I was stoked that he and I would be working together. However, I was a little scared as to whether Charlie would re-write the song completely as both of us tend to do. On a duet, re-writing can be tricky.
Charlie wasn't difficult to work with at all. We both are very creative people, and after fair discussion, we were able to agree on a 50-50 deal to incorporate both of our ideas. It was a powerful performance for me and I wouldn't have chosen anyone else to sing the classic song, “Don't Let the Sun Go Down On Me” by Elton John. I love Charlie, and the fact that he believes in my talent means a lot. We did our thing.
After I read the list, I thought of how my dream for GLEE was shattered, and I vowed that from that moment forth, I would succeed in becoming a pop recording artist, motivational speaker and actor. I remembered that my talent got me on this competition, and it should be that same talent that allows me to entertain and inspire millions once I am signed. I had to remain positive, but I was stunned that I had been eliminated at the end of adaptability weak. I was only able to show them a fraction of my talent, and I believed it was far too soon for me to go. Nevertheless, it's my fault for not asking for clearer acting direction.
I have gained six brothers and 7 sisters through my experience on The Glee Project. I have been given the chance of a lifetime, which I owe to Oxygen, Robert Ulrich, Ryan Murphy, and so many more. No matter the odds, I know The Glee Project has strengthened me professionally and socially. It was the big break I needed, and although GLEE may now seem out of reach, my ultimate dream to record and inspire has been fueled because of The Glee Project and Oxygen. To Oxygen, I say thank you for the opportunity to share my hopes, dreams and talents with your audience. I owe it all to you. P.S. I'm here if ya need me again! LOL
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