The first day of school: sure, it's a big day for students everywhere, but I'd argue that it's even more of a special occasion for moms. Your little one - or not-so-little one - going back out into the world is a pretty huge deal. It may be only one day a year, but it causes such a ridiculous, chaotic blend of emotions: relief, sadness, paranoia, and total elation (because freedom! Finally!). Here are 8 thoughts every mother has on that big day.
1. . This is the best day of my life!
Ok, sure, it's a little dramatic, but the prospect of getting just a little bit of freedom every day is enough to make any parent want to dance. There's nothing more soul-sucking than spending an entire summer with your little one(s) at home with you, attached to you nearly every second of the day; by the time the first day of school rolls around, you're like 99% sure you know what it feels like to be released from prison.
2. . What should I wear? Does it even matter?
People at his school are only gonna see me for about five minutes, so just how dressed do I want to get this morning? Is makeup something I should even attempt? I want to look good in our mommy-and-me first day selfies, but come on - mascara? It's like 7 am.
3. . Making someone else's lunch should never be this stressful.
The internet is truly the worst thing to ever happen to moms. On top of everything else on my plate, now I'm expected to make his lunch Pinterest-worthy? Whatever happened to throwing a PB&J and apple in a brown bag and calling it a day? I don't think my 5 year-old is going to properly appreciate this themed Bento box.
4. . People expect you to be late on the first day, right?
Don't judge me, world. I can't find literally anything on this supply list, even though I packed his backpack just last night. If we get out of here with all of our shoes on and having eaten at least half a pop tart each, I'll call it a good day.
5. . Why does everyone else's child look like they walked out of a Gap ad?
Seriously, that little girl is better dressed than I am. Did I put together a good enough outfit for him? At least his shirt and shoes kinda sorta match, right? That's more than I can say for myself, kiddo.
6. . I'm not crying, you're crying!
Ok, maybe I am crying. But he was just so little and now he's not as little! But he's still so little, and cute, and tiny, and precious, and oh my God, how am I supposed to trust these people with someone so little and tiny and cute all day? Can I just sit with him and stroke his hair and shower him with kisses periodically? Ok, yeah, that's weird. Tone it down, self. But look at his little face!
7. . God, I hope he has a good day.
What if he doesn't like his teacher? What if his teacher doesn't like him? What if he doesn't feel confident because I didn't pick him out a good enough outfit and the Gap kids start making fun of him? I can't handle these emotions.
8. . I wonder if his school is a Pokestop.
Yes, moms play Pokemon Go too. I totally don't mind driving to school every day, but if I can grab a few items and hopefully catch some new Pokemon while I'm at it, that'd be ace.