How To Motivate Yourself So You Don't Die Sad

Because you will definitely, definitely die!

By Alida Nugent

It’s late February, and if you’re like me, you already feel the curious phenomena of time feeling both incredibly slow and like it’s slipping away from you at an uncontrollable rate. I can’t believe I have to submit my taxes in a few months! Just yesterday, I was ten, feeling the sun on my cheeks, embracing life in all its innocence! Do you see what I mean? I procrastinate with my W2’s, and I haven’t felt the sun on my cheeks…in a long time.

As time falls through my hands like the sand in a sandbox that you are too old to now play in, I do see some benefits to the growing age marks around my eyes and creeping exhaustion. You feel a sense of motivation, to mark your life with some good things for people to remember you by, instead of the usual “she loves cheese curls” and “she couldn’t stop eating the cheese curls in my house, even when I asked her to stop.”

But how to motivate oneself? How do you get up and do things? Like I said, it’s February and my ancient New Year’s Resolution of eating dumplings in Flushing is no longer possible. I can see no real reason how that would happen. So I turn my attention to my other, easier accomplished resolutions: work harder, get more done, live a life worth living, go the gym once just to see what it looks like and smells like inside. My journey is a simple one. Every day, I want to do something worthwhile. Or anything at all, really. Here are my steps to motivate you to get things done:

1. . Take A Look At The Big Picture

Instead of getting drunk with your best friend and basically milking each other for feel-good ideas---I just want to make ART---in a way that is helpful to no one, sit with yourself. You have to live every morning with being yourself. What do you want to do? Do you want to sit around and drink cheap red wine and say art so many times, art rolls over in its grave and dies? Or do you want to do things that have a direct, nameable goal? Plan for five years from now. Know where you want to go in some manageable way. Jesus Christ, I read on the internet that one time, your parents put you down and then never picked you up again! We have limited time! Come up with a path!

2. . Do SOMETHING For At Least 15 Minutes

Literally do anything worthwhile for fifteen minutes a day. That’s like 2 boring Youtube videos worth of time. It’s nothing. Apply to a new job. Check your damn finances. Write goals down. Google dream travel places and see how much it costs instead of reading some lame-o list on traveling before you are 30. Do I really have to give you examples? I’m not your dream genie, do it yourself! 

3. . Get Out of Bed and Push Forward

Oh my God, life stinks sometimes. Every day is some lame test on your patience. You’ll have to spend an enormous amount of money on dumb things you don’t want to spend your money on. You’ll get packed like a sardine in the subway. You’ll date people that are as helpful and lovely as wet socks. But we have all established that there are awful things in life. I can name a million: people who argue on Facebook statuses, bad wifi, AllLivesMatter supporters, the list goes on. But I will say: the people who go far are the people who get up anyway, amidst the muck, and keep pushing. They can still complain. But they push, too. Be one of those people. But again, definitely still complain about things you cannot change but love to make fun of.

4. . Remember, You Are Mortal

Not only do you die, but you also don’t know when. It could be tomorrow. It could be now, if you’re Bruce Willis. So make some changes. I do want to reiterate that this isn’t one of those lists that is like: rah rah! You can accomplish anything if you believe in it! Because this is also untrue. You will never, ever get all the things you want before you die, unless you are vomiting money. But you can get some things. And you know, reasonably, what those some things are. So make your own changes, and do little stuff that will make you happy because:

5. . Also Remember That No One But You Cares

Only YOU care the most about your life, and maybe your mom. But not even her. You will always care the most about your life, so you have to do the most to make yourself a person with a life that you enjoy. Just remember that, because people will always have dumb things to say about your life but they also aren’t as invested in it as you think. Friends are great, too, but they are also mostly worried about themselves. So do stuff for you. Live your own life well.

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