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Neiman Marcus Is Selling Collard Greens For $80, And The Internet Just Cannot!

Gentrification strikes the family cuisine industry... hide your grandmothers!

Neiman Marcus, the high-end designer apparel and beauty franchise, is now selling collard greens. Yes, you read that right. Collard greens, I wrote!

Apparently in an effort to properly prepare for the turkey day to come, Neiman Marcus will be selling some seasonal holiday cuisine for Thanksgiving. And no, we are not in the Twilight Zone, April's Fool was months ago back when we had weather that made sense.

Now, we're in November and everyone's gearing up for the festivities.

They will be selling the ready-to-eat dishes for anyone willing to pay a ridiculous amount of money for pre-seasoned food that will only require an oven or microwave to serve hot. 

The greens, “seasoned with just the right amount of spices and bacon” according to their website, will sell for $66, plus an additional $15 for shipping. But if you're down for a full menu, there is also a baked bean medley for $80, a broccoli cheese casserole for $65 and stuffed cornish hens for $120-- I'm guessing that's for the price of two.

Yes, this is all very confusing. But don't fret. You're not the only one searching for answers:


Yup! That about sums it up...

[Photo: Screenshot, Neiman Marcus Website]

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