What's Up With Melania Trump, Tho?

Who is she?

Who's that pretty lady lurking silently in the background of all of our recent political events lately? Why, it's Melania Trump! While our nation trembles at the terrifying future in store for us under a Donald Trump presidency, many of us know very little about our future First Lady. Who is she? Where is she from? What does she stand for?

Melania Trump, formerly Melanija Knauss, hails from Novo Mesto, in a territory then known as Yugoslavia. According to The New Yorker:  She was "raised in a Communist apartment block in Sevnica, a pretty riverside town where a smuggled Coke was a major treat." Little is known about how she got out of that environment, but her website states that for a while she was “jetting between photo shoots in Paris and Milan" as a model. She may or may not have studied architecture and design. She met The Donald in 1998 at the Kit Kat Club in New York. After a contentious courtship which caught the eyes of The New York Post, Donald proposed to Melania at the Costume Institute Gala in 2004. She eventually became his third wife. Their wedding was attended by the Clintons. Her hobbies "include Pilates and reading magazines."

Melania was largely absent from the campaign trail, choosing to stay at home in New York with her 10-year-old son, Barron Trump. Her website states that she now identifies mostly as a wife, a mother, a philanthropist, a New Yorker, and a participant in “numerous television commercials, most recently for Aflac,” in which she “stars with one of America’s top icons, the Aflac duck.” It does not detail the more lascivious parts of her career.

Donald once bragged about the "incredible sex" he has with her to Howard Stern.

Her most notable political speech was largely plagarized from the current first lady. News of the idea theft became a meme for a hot minute, but bigger news stories emerged shortly thereafter.

The fact that Melania was not born an American is shocking when considering her husband's stance on immigration (which, by the way, she largely agrees with) — but her statements on the subject follow Trump's rhetoric: “I came here for my career, and I did so well, I moved here,” she told Harper’s Bazaar. “It never crossed my mind to stay here without papers. That is just the person you are. You follow the rules. You follow the law. Every few months you need to fly back to Europe and stamp your visa.” Similarly, despite her claims that she wants to be an advocate for women (see video below), when Melania was faced with accusations of assault being made against her husband she replied that she didn't believe the women coming forward: “I believe my husband,” she said. “My husband didn’t do anything.”

Melania's personal political opinions are mysterious at best. She was a birther, that's for sure. More recently, though, there is one issue she has committed herself to: she wants to fight against cyberbullying. The irony of this is too obvious to comment upon.

As First Lady, Melania will become a target of extreme scrutiny. Many are already attempting to use Melania's sexual history against her. This is bad for a number of reasons. Don't do this.

And that's kind of all we got? While Trump's cabinet forms, Melania surely seems like one of the least threatening figures in the future regime. But we'll certainly be getting to know her better in the next four years — for better (or more likely) worse.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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