Teddy Learns From His Mistakes (ATRM, Ep. 4)
I felt badly when Kyle told me about his conversation with Noelle, of course. As I had mentioned before, Noelle sharing her feelings for me at the bar that night came as a complete shock, the kiss came out of nowhere while out on the dance floor. It was one of those things that happened in a split second- you immediately stop and say "whoa...that can't happen." At first I didn't think it was anything to even mention but being that I DO have a conscience and tremendous respect for Kyle, who I consider a brother, I thought it only fair to do the right thing, no matter what the consequences or to what expense, or how much grief humiliation I would have to endure......which I AM!!! That has been extremely hard for me, to be so criticized and bashed on social media, as I've never EVER betrayed or been disloyal to a friend in any way. I've apologized profusely, taking full responsibility, and manning up to my mistake. I greatly admire both Kyle and Noelle and I'm happy to say we have all moved past this with no hard feelings. In the end we all love each other and forgiveness is part of what being a true friend is about. Life lessons are learned through making mistakes; the only BAD mistakes are those we don't learn from.
I have been fortunate enough to perform on Dancing with the Stars several times now, both as a dancer and a choreographer. It is a huge opportunity, and I was honored to have been asked to be in this particular performance. I love getting the chance to perform outside of the contemporary style, especially with my amazing hip hop friends Twitch, Brian, Misha Gabriel, Nick Bass, and so many others. They inspire and motivate me to continue to expand my knowledge, breaking down the stereotypical barriers and misconceptions that contemporary dancers can't do hip hop, and hip hop dancers can't do contemporary. That couldn’t be further from the truth. Sure, we all have our specialty that we excel in over the others, but it shouldn't dictate, confine, or prevent us from exploring beyond one art form. It's all in your own mind set what you can or cannot achieve. I prefer to remain open to ALL possibilities. I want to be limitless in my growth.
When I was first asked to be in the DWTS piece, the schedule did not initially appear to show a conflict, otherwise I would have let DWTS know that I could not be there. But I also knew that Kyle was going to NUVO, and could easily fill in for me, giving him an opportunity to feel more like a part of Shaping Sound, if by chance a conflict were to arise.
We all have busy schedules outside of the company, it can be a challenge to balance that, so I knew that initially telling the boys I couldn't go with them to NUVO was going to cause them to get their panties in a twist! But knowing that Kyle was eager to jump in, gave me reassurance that I wasn't just leaving them high and dry, and there was a solution to the problem. I’m the first to admit that my organizational skills are lacking at times, but what I lack in organization, I feel I make up for in my work ethic, my passion, and my drive. The hard part of this business is all the last minute unexpected things that come up. The way I see it, you can either let it totally freak you out putting you in a state of panic all the time, or you accept that ultimately choices have to be made and you have to do what's right for you. I'm looking forward to the day I can afford a personal assistant, god knows I need one! Hahaha!
Although I was disappointed about not getting my submission in on time to So You Think You Can Dance, at that point I was honestly considering holding off for next season anyway so I could have more time to improve the editing of what I shot to make it the best it could be. I have far too much respect for SYTYCD along with Twitch and Alli to send in anything less than spectacular. But everyone talked me into trying to get it in anyway despite my reservations. I knew walking into the agency that chances were slim and I had already accepted that possibility. Hopefully I can re-submit for the following season using a higher quality edited version, along with a montage of other pieces- a body of work to be proud of not something that wasn't 100% just to meet a deadline.
Meeting with Taja was my way of trying to resolve the situation, with the hopes of alleviating stress on Travis and the rest of the company. I prefer to discuss things in a calm, peaceful, non-antagonistic kind of way, putting people at ease, not on the defense. I knew that Travis had a lot on his plate, and with the toxicity of their relationship, I felt I might be able to help. Being one of the co-founders of Shaping Sound, if I see a problem within the company, it should be expected that I too, along with Nick, step up and take on some of the tasks that need to be dealt with. Travis tends to forget that this is a "one for all and all for one" kind of deal, and tries to take on all the responsibility. We always have to remind him that we are a team and he's not alone. We are here to support, encourage, and provide that shoulder to lean on. Overall, I think the meeting went well, with the necessary points being made from both perspectives. Yes, Taja is a complex individual but despite what people think she is very focused and passionate about her work. Due to the specific nature of the role she was cast for in the show, I knew it would have been difficult to do it without her.