Shoppers at one Publix grocery store parking lot got quite a sight in Vero Beach, Florida on Thursday night.
Jonathan Boettcher, 46 was allegedly jumping on cars, punching cars and kicking over trashcans in the parking lot — all while naked, according to an arrest report from the Indian River County Sheriff's Department, obtained by Oxygen.com.
When police arrived, Boettcher was allegedly sweating uncontrollably, swinging his arms and yelling with a pair of basketball shorts bunched up around his ankles.
Police said he was screaming, "I only had one beer!" and “I only wanted to smoke some pot.”
Boettcher reportedly kicked over the cigarette disposal on a trashcan before entering Publix and yelling, "You're not the one!"
Another witness told the cops he was stopping traffic and punching cars before taking off his clothing.
When a police deputy spoke to Boettcher, he explained that he drank one beer and smoked part of a marijuana joint in the homeless camp behind the supermarket.
He also explained why he took off his clothing.
Boettcher said there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for taking off his clothing: A friend drove by and "mooned" him, so he was merely "mooning" him back.
Later, he told the deputy that taking off his pants was "the only way we would get him out of there," according to the arrest report.
As for the sweating? Boettcher blamed the Florida heat, which as a Wisconsinite, he wasn’t used to.
He was arrested and charged with disorderly public intoxication. A judge sentenced him on Friday to 45 days in county jail, according to the Miami Herald.
[Photo: Indian River County Sheriff's Office]