‘There Is Nothing About This Situation I Find Cute Or Funny,’ Judge Scolds Man In Court For Gross Salsa Crime

Howard Matthew Webb laughed in court after pleading guilty to an amended charge of misdemeanor assault/offensive touching after dipping his testicles in salsa.

By Ethan Harfenist
Howard Matthew Webb

A man accused of dipping his testicles in salsa that a customer ordered online nearly derailed his plea deal with prosecutors when he laughed in court.

The Knoxville News Sentinel reports 31-year-old Howard Matthew Webb pleaded guilty Tuesday to an amended charge of misdemeanor assault/offensive touching. He apparently chuckled after entering his plea and was scolded by Blount County General Sessions Court Judge Robert Headrick.

“What are you laughing about, Mr. Webb?” Headrick said, according to the News Sentinel. “There is nothing about this situation I find cute or funny. It’s abhorrent!”

Webb was arrested last month and initially charged with felony adulteration of food.

A delivery driver allegedly recorded it and posted a video online, saying, “This is what you get when you give an 89 cents tip for an almost 30-minute drive,” according to local CBS affiliate WVLT.

Food service company Dinner Delivered said it has fired the driver and sent information about her to authorities, WVLT reports.

“These acts appear to be motivated by singular personal frustrations of this sole contractor, and are absolutely not reflective of the behavior of the remainder of our capable and customer-oriented delivery force or the principles and values of Dinner Delivered as an organization,” the company said in a February Facebook post.

News outlets report Webb was sentenced to six months' probation. He will need to serve 30 days in jail first, but will get credit for the 21 days he’s already been incarcerated, according to the News Sentinel.

Maryville Police Chief Tony Crisp said on Tuesday that the case remains under investigation, according to the News Sentinel.

The Associated Press contributed to this report.

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