Okay, okay, I am excited. Who would have ever thought that Tanisha Thomas, the Queen of popping off, pots and pans, and Brooklyn, son! would be one of the first Bad Girl alums to put a ring on it??? Well, after the first episode of her spanking new series Tanisha Gets Married (spoiler alert!) I can understand why. The show should REALLY be called Tanisha is Awesome, because that is what she is.
After all the hijinks and fighting of the most recent season of Bad Girls Club, it is a relief to see that a Bad Girl can indeed mature and grow into a woman. Yes, Tanisha still likes her snacks and mac and cheese, but she has also grown up quite a bit and is now engaged to her boyfriend of seven years, Clive. They’ve set a wedding date of December 4, which is oh just 5 weeks away. And what a surprise, Tanisha hasn’t planned ANYTHING! This is going to be fun!
In order to save money for the big day, Tanisha and Clive live in her mother’s basement, which is actually quite spacious. Heck, I’d move in! Clive works at night in a grocery store while Tanisha is carrying most of the weight by making appearances and hosting television shows such as Love Games and the Bad Girls Club reunions. Despite her impressive work ethic, Clive’s family still hasn’t warmed to her. In fact, they refuse to have anything to do with the wedding. Way harsh!
Tanisha has chosen her cousin Arkeen to be her maid of honor. While getting their nails done together, Arkeen asks Tanisha about Clive’s plans for the future. She worries that Tanisha will have to support him forever. Tanisha gets fake upset, telling the pedicurist to stop working on Arkeen’s toes, but you know home girl agrees. I mean, will he ever be able to pay for her snacks, or will she have to use her own money at Dunkin Donuts when she’s craving an Old Fashioned? It’s interesting to me that Clive’s family has shunned her, when she’s clearly the prize. Yes, she was one tough broad on the second season of Bad Girls Club, but now she’s making gazillions of dollars. Time to move on, Clive’s family!
Back at the house, Tanisha and Arkeen talk about potential bridesmaids, including Flo, Amber/Cookie, and everyone’s favorite runner of LA, Natalie Nunn! Clive is asleep even though he is due to be at work in oh just ten minutes. When Tanisha wakes him up, he blames her because apparently she should have woken him up earlier. Arkeen points out that Tanisha better nip this behavior in the bud, because it’s only going to be worse once they are married!
The next morning Clive returns with a bunch of Tanisha’s beloved snacks. She’s super excited but then she asks him if she should go on a diet, a classic woman’s move that never goes where you want it to go. Not smart Tanisha! Anyway, Clive hems and haws and finally is all yes, I would like you to be a size 8. Since Tanisha is currently a size 16 that means he only wants half of her. But he buys her snacks! Make up your mind Clive!
Tanisha and Clive talk finances. Clive has saved up 5k for the wedding, and Tanisha has managed to save 50k. You go girl! Because she doesn’t want to constantly mother him, she encourages him to step up and try to make it on time to work for a week. Baby steps.
Meanwhile, Tanisha meets former Bad Girl from Season 4 Flo for lunch. Flo is now married with a kid, and she admits to Tanisha that marriage is the hardest thing she’s ever done. This is not what Tanisha wants to hear. She then asks Flo to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. Flo is excited till she hears that Natalie may also be in the wedding. Apparently Natalie tweeted that Flo was in the club drinking while preggers with her daughter and now Flo has threatened to confront her in the bathroom for an apology. Ah, drama!
When Tanisha arrives home, she Skypes Natalie to invite her to come to Brooklyn before she agrees to have her in her wedding. They used to be tight but then they got in a fight. What a shocker. They joke around with each other so methinks they’ll end up okay.
Now it’s time to actually plan that wedding that is just five weeks away! Tanisha meets with two female wedding planners from New York who command up to $10,000, which is 20% of her budget. Tanisha, who feels no need to front, admits that’s way too much for her. She then meets with a trio of guys at a diner (of course) who tell her that the FAT (Fabulous and Tasty!) and blinged out wedding she desires will cost her 150k. She’s all, haha, no way!
Next she needs to find a venue. Luckily she’s getting married in December so there are a few available. She visits once place in Long Island called the Swan Club with an uptight director who refuses Tanisha’s request to serve mac and cheese at the wedding. This is a deal breaker for Tanisha so she is excited when she visits the Thatched Cottage, also in Long Island, because the director there—Maureen—is a big girl like Tanisha so she gets the importance of food. Maureen is totes on board for a mac and cheese station.
Tanisha and Clive return home where her mother and brother have prepared a big meal for them. Tanisha asks them for advice on the wedding planners, and Clive has nothing to say. This devolves into a conversation about the lack of participation of Clive’s family in the wedding and why they don’t like Tanisha. Boooo. Luckily, unlike the Bad Girls Club, no chairs are thrown.
So there we have it. Out Bad Girl Tanisha has grown up! I can’t wait till the bachelorette party!
Till next week—
Liz Out Loud